end of 2012

it's 17th december 2012, few more days and it'll be happy new year 2013, everyone will be celebrating the coming of new year, new hope, new life, new beginning.. i pray that Allah will give me and my family all the happiness in this world and hereafter.. i lost my father, he passed away on 7th November 2012 in his sleep (after battling with his sickness for as long as i can remember) at the age of 57, on the 8th he was supposed to be 58.. everything about my life has been about him, ever since he got sick, i couldn't go anywhere for the fear that my family members would call me up and tell me that he's gone.. i always made sure i stay close to home, always made sure i come back every weekend to do the weekend chores and look after abah and the girls, andy will send abah to dialysis every saturday, cooking for him although i don't think i could cook to save my life, and abah would always told me that it's nice, i've improved on my cooking.. the last time we went out as a family was on 26th October 2012, it was eid adha, we eat at johnny's bukit raja, (his favourite eating place apart from chicken rice shop) and while shopping for shoes, he sat at the massage chair and we had to refill the rm1 again and again, and when we're done, he said just one more time like a small kid.. too much memories, joy, pain, love, laughter, journey.. my life has always been about abah.. i miss abah, he was Allah's gift to me, his memories is Allah's gift to me.. but everything in life is temporary.. al-Fatihah..